The Reason Why I Smile

A couple of months ago, a third year medical student (not from my school) asked me what year of medical school I was in. I responded simply by saying I was in my first year. Her response, “ Oh that makes sense. That is why you are so bright eyed and smiling.”

Excuse me?

Now, if you really know me, you know that this is nothing out of the ordinary. I love being bright, I smile all the time and love bright colors. I had never met this fellow medical student before that day and perhaps, she did not have any bad intentions but her statement got me kinda scared instantly. I thought to myself “so as I go along this journey, will my bright eyes dim? Will my smile diminish?” I could not help but to be saddened by the thought that the profession that I have been called to do is what will take away my joy and light.

I felt this way for a couple of days and each day, I grew even more afraid because I had an exam the following week and the stress of studying constantly reminded me of the statement that the lady made. I kept thinking to myself, “oh yea this is what she meant. Your work will steal your joy.”

But then one day, just randomly, as I was lying down in bed getting ready to sleep, the Holy Spirit reminded me of something that was right in front of my face. He reminded me that He is my joy and my light.

Now, that reminder jostled me. I opened my eyes instantly and affirmed myself saying, yes of course He is my joy. How could I not remember that my Father in Heaven has promised that  He is working on my behalf? How could I forget that the author and finisher of my faith is living on the inside of me? God captured my heart at that moment and I began to smile. He reminded me that joy and light are mine. There was no need to fear that they were going to go away unless I allowed the devil to take it away from me… unless I allowed myself to flee from them. This reminder honestly made me feel ashamed that I allowed man’s word to get to me like that as if they were the god in my life.

Psalm 94:19 New International Version (NIV)

¹⁹ When anxiety was great within me,
    your consolation brought me joy.

Life is not easy. It is no joke koraa (“at all” in Twi). There are definitely difficult moments and there will definitely be even more difficult times. However, if we allow our difficult and challenging moments to dictate our joy, we would live a miserable life. Ultimately, I came to the realization that joy is something that you have to train yourself and constantly remind yourself to be because it can come and go and if you are not strong, it will go away for a very long time, lost, forgotten, maybe never recoverable. Joy is not based on circumstances. It is a “despite” word and feeling (James 1:2). I urge you to tell yourself today that despite this hard journey called life, called med school, called (insert your situation here) choose to remind yourself to be bright eyed and smile. I smile because I know whose I am.

Song Reminder: “I Smile”- Kirk Franklin

God bless you.

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